Sandals: Natural Canvas Tote

Regular price $15.00

Michael: Aren’t you going to ask me how Jamaica was? Say it. Ask me.
Pam: How was Jamaica?
Michael: It was so good. Oh, Hey mon! At Sandals, Jamaica, when somebody says “Hey mon,” everybody says “Hey mon” back.

Hey mon! Are you feeling hot hot hot? Then cool down with this 100% unauthentic Sandals Jamaica gear! And you won't need two tickets to paradise to snag this tote! Just hit the buy it now button, dust off the old calypso drum, make yourself a piña colada and throw yourself a luau! Some might say it's impossible but the Jamaicans don't have a word for impossible! All you need are some grass skirts, pineapple, poi, tiki torches, suckling pig, some fire dancers. That’s all you need. So whether you're prepping for beach day or planning to wind up tan almost everywhere, Jan almost everywhere with a German woman named Urkel Grue this tote is all inclusive when it comes to relaxing and partying all the time! Much like in Jamaica! Even if it is kind of an impoverished country...

Made in Sandals Jamaica in Los Angeles, CA (just pretend that made sense)
*No quality, no authenticity, no problem
*This tote could be in Maxim
*Boring. Call me if she rolls over.
*Face it. You’re never gonna make it
*I called every grocery store in Scranton, and no one sells whole pigs
*Did you try the petting zoo?