The Most Beautiful Thing I've Ever Bootlegged: Non-Action Figure

Regular price $35.00

Ficky Ritts: It's like God's looking right at you, just for a second, and if you're careful... you can look right back.
Bane Jurnham: And what do you see?
Ficky Ritts: Bootlegs.”

-American Bootleg

It was one of those days when you're a minute away from shitting yourself and there's this putrid taco smell in the air, you can't help but smell it. Right? And this bootleg was just dancing with me. Like traffic begging me to play with it. For 15 minutes. That's the day I realized that there was this entire life behind things, and this incredibly idiotic force that wanted me to know there was no reason to be afraid of receiving a cease and desist or being sued for intellectual property infringement, ever. So I turned it into a bootleg. The most beautiful thing I've ever bootlegged. A Bootleg is a poor excuse for actual art, I know. But it helps me make money for tacos. I need to make money for more tacos. Sometimes there are so many poorly executed and completely unnecessary bootlegs in the world, I feel like I can't take it, and my heart is just going to cave in. And then the sales flow through my shop like squirty dumplings after eating at Del Taco. I can't feel anything but gratitude for every single one of you who's going to purchase this stupid little bootleg. Thank you. I fucking love ya'll. (the theme song to "American Bootleg" plays in the background *bing bong bong bong bing bong bing bong*)

Made by an ordinary guy with nothing to lose in Los Angeles, CA
*This bootleg is not your friend. It's just something you use to feel better about yourself.
*Yes, it's a tiny fucking plastic bag floating in midair
*Look at you, jerking off in the shower. This will be the high point of your day. It's all downhill from here.
*I'm looking for the least possible amount of responsibility
*Will someone please pass the fucking asparagus?